If Wishes Were Actors...

I've been upset ever since I've heard that Sean Penn would be playing Harvey Milk in Gus Van Sant's biopic. Now there's this:


UGGHHH!

Whereas I once just had an abstract vision of what Penn might do to defame Milk's memory, I now have hard evidence in the form of a fake campaign poster that's been created for the film's production. Apparently, Van Sant's crew has taken over the Castro and is revamping the whole street to look as it did in the seventies. That's cool and all, but I maintain that I am wholeheartedly against Sean Penn playing Harvey Milk.

Literally anyone would've been better in the role of Milk: Jake Gylenhaal, Kevin Spacey, Johnny Depp... even T.R. Knight would've done. Let's not even get started on about how Penn's infamous bravado and overwrought machismo is at direct odds with Milk's image as peace-keeper and bridge-builder.

If people are still even allowed to have heros, then Harvey Milk is mine. If you haven't seen The Times of Harvey Milk, then stop reading right now and get thee to a Netflix. You'll thank me later.

I'm honestly hoping that Penn is able to pull a Tom Cruise in Interview with the Vampire with this role and then I'll be all Anne Rice and say, "Oh my God, I totally thought you were gonna suck, but now I love you." That would be ideal, but as a douchey dude I used to work with once said, "If wishes were horses, then beggars would ride." Vomit.